No Laughing Matter: From Kamtophobia To Tchirophobia

Ever since the pseudo-independence of the Cameroons, there has been an undeclared but prevailing maxim, that “the fear of the gendarme is the beginning of wisdom.” From the first republic under President Ahmadou Ahidjo since the quasi-independence in 1960 for la Rèpublique du Cameroun, and 1961 for Southern Cameroons and the two became the Federal Republic of Cameroon, this fear has caged the nation.

Both leaders have used gendarmes to oppress dissidents and suppress opposition to their tyrannical rule. Their agents and assigns, family and friends have also taken advantage of their connections and oppress real or presumed adversaries in their neighbourhoods and towns of residence. This, discernibly, cast a spell on citizens. Even a citizen that has not committed any offence, feels uneasy and insecure in the presence of a gendarme. That is how government officials have been having their way within communities with the use of gendarmes, to grab land and other property and even the wives or lovers of other people. That is how the ruling CPDM party militants have been browbeating the opposition and lording it over communities and stealing their votes.

This could be coined as “gendarmophobia”, which means the fear of the gendarme. Anybody attached to the government or militating for the ruling CPDM has been exploiting this fear of the people against the people.

Then came Professor Maurice Kamto’s seeking to become president from when he created his party, Movement for the reconciliation of Cameroon, MRC, with his intellectual and legal arsenal. Virtually due to the fear the CPDM party has all along driven into people, and here was a man determined to overturn the trend, the party and its leader caught fever, from the 2018 presidential election which Kamto claimed he won and his victory was stolen by the incumbent; to the build up to the 2025 presidential election for which he declared his candidacy, the CPDM and its leader have evidently been having fever from the fear of Kamto, which we have coined as ‘Kamtophobia’.

Everything was done to block Professor Maurice Kamto from running the race. And they succeeded. Well, the regime thought it had said good riddance to bad rubbish. It had glaringly cleared the obstacle on its way to have a free ride to reinstate itself.

Then, Issa Bakary Tchiroma popped up and has become the new monster. Then Tchirophobia set in. It has been alleged that he is being propped by one or the other international power or organisation. And so what? Was the RDPC leader not mounted on Cameroon by the French? Has he not done their bidding for 43 years?

They claim Tchiroma is just another devil! And so what? The situation is even different because the Tchiromatic devil has been acquiesced by the Cameroonian people, against the other devil.

Isn’t it said that variety is a spice of life? If I have two devils in front of me, and I have had one devil in my nightmares for almost half a century; is it not my right to want a change of the devil? At least, let me see a different face for four, five or seven years. By the time the new devil’s face becomes a nightmare, I can go for another one, and another, until I get an angel.

I had thought the new devil would wear a Kamtovic face. He was diabolically removed. The new devil should wear a new face, even if is a Tchiromatic mask. I would prefer that.

Was it not a Man of God, the Bishop of Yagoua, who, prayed that the devil should leave the Lord’s flog alone after almost five decades? Ostensibly, Catholic faithful were confessing that they were doing work for a presumed angel for so long, hence, the Man of God preached that, even a devil should take over and then, we can see after that?

To the so-called intellectuals who have been the abject opposite of real intellectuals around the world where people look up to them for guidance and direction: I say a loud-sounding: Shame! The Cameroonian people have put a kibosh on their selfish misdirection and stomachracy.

Never Again!

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